Most of these are funny, but some of them are just plain ‘ol sad.
Thanks to my friend Sandra Laws for passing these on!
* Objective: Seeking a party-time position with room for advancement
* Professional headline: 1 year old marketing executive
* Achievement: Planned new corporate facility at $3M over budget.
* Explanation of employment gap: career break in 1999 to renovate my horse
* References: Referees available upon request
* Skills: I am a rabid typist
* Strengths: Impersonal skills
* Hobbies: Enjoy cooking Chinese and Italians
* Education: College: August 1880 to May 1984
* Cover letter: I would like to assure you that I am a hardly working person.
And just how much information on a resume is too much?
* Objective: To have my skills and ethics challenged on a regular basis
* Personal Information: Married, eight children, prefer frequent travel
* Language Skills: Exposure to German for two years-but many words are inappropriate for business
* Reason for leaving last job: the owner gave new meaning to the word paranoia
* Achievements: Nominated for prom queen
* Education: Finished eighth in a class of ten
* Interests: Gossiping
* Awards: National record for eating 45 eggs in two minutes
* References: Bill, Tom, Eric – but I don’t know their phone numbers
* Salary: The higher the better
* Cover letter: Please disregard the attached resume; it’s totally outdated